I'm Sorry

So I am dating someone now and I kind of dig her. So there is no comedic responses coming until I screw it up somehow. Sorry...

Crickets.......

Guess what?

I went on another date. I wasn't sure how the first play by play would pan out via blog form. Looks like you guys were a fan. So here is my latest dating disaster, enjoy......

Name: Samantha

City: San Diego

Age: 30

First Impression: First thing I notice about her is her teeth to gum ratio. It's terrible. Am I a jerk for noticing that? It's as if her teeth and gums are having a territorial battle and the gums are dominating at such a rate that the teeth don't have much longer to live. She is all gums. Other than that she is pretty attractive. Has way more style than me. But really who doesn't

How the date went: We met at a bar near my place for a drink. Or what would turn out to be 4 in her case. We exchange pleasantries, sit down and I order a crown and water after she orders a lemon drop martini. "I hate whiskey", she says(I hate ______ would be an ongoing theme of the night). I have never met someone who abused the word "hate" as much as her. No words like prefer or dislike or can't stand. Always hate this and hate that.

We have absolutely nothing in common. I mean nothing. She "hates" hockey, "hates" indy music, doesn't watch TV. I have no where to go with this date. So I ask her why don't we lighten it up a bit by talking about something we both enjoy. Cue the crickets......

We seriously had nothing to talk about. She didn't laugh at any of my sarcasm or jokes. I mean nothing, not even a chuckle or smirk. She was all business. She seemed a bit nervous, because she was crushing these fruity martini's. She explains to me she hasn't really dated much. I make a joke about how this is clearly going nowhere so there is no need to be nervous. There we go! A smile. She breaks out an "oh thank god". I laugh out loud.

There is something to be said about two people going on a first date, it crashing and burning, and both of you being able to acknowledge how terrible it is. It felt very adult like. I don't have many moments like that.

So we start to say goodbye and in perfect fashion as two people who have nothing in common she goes in for a hug, I break out the high five(it's gold). I walk her to her car, I go home. Only to receive a call from her asking me if she can hang at my place for a bit because she is a little to drunk to drive. I want to kill myself but agree. An hour of crickets later she is gone......forever.

Another Date: Not a chance.......